Archive for the ‘Panties’ Category

Permission Revoked

December 20, 2016

For a good portion of this year Ms Lee has been generous enough to allow me to masturbate once per month at a time of my choosing. I was very grateful to her for this but was always aware that she could end my monthly fun at any time. Recently she did just that, telling me that I was once again to be in chastity and not to touch myself in a sexual way without her permission.

Unfortunately I failed to understand her clear instruction to be in chastity and mistakenly assumed that I did not need to resume wearing my chastity sleeve. When Ms Lee became aware of my failure to adhere to her explicit expectations she was understandably upset with me. As a result of my failure she is requiring me to wear my chastity sleeve 24 hours a day with the only exception being when I shower.

Previously whenever I wore my chastity sleeve 24 hours a day it would soon wind up bruised and battered as my deprived penis strained against the implacable chastity chains in a futile attempt to enjoy an erection. This time was no different and soon my penis was suffering from a number of bruises and cuts. Here is a photo showing a couple of scabs on my penis that resulted from the damage it suffered:

scabs-on-my-penis

You might notice in the photo that the fur around my penis has been severely cut back and shaved. This was a result of my needing to trim back my fur so I would not offend Ms Lee with any unsightly hair showing under some new, dainty panties that I purchased to replace some of my worn older ones.

It has now been almost three weeks since Ms Lee required me to begin wearing my chastity sleeve 24×7 and my poor penis is finally beginning to get used to its fate. The scabs are slowly clearing but my penis continues to feel like a squashed and crushed sausage. Frankly it looks like one too. I would never dare disobey Ms Lee’s expectation that I not touch myself sexually without her permission but even if I did I doubt it would be any fun stroking a penis that is covered in scabs and bruises.

When I mentioned my frustration to Ms Lee she told me to change my focus to service oriented things. This made sense as it was pointless to worry about my frustration since I had no control over when I might be allowed to touch myself. As I turned my focus more often to service related things like my chores and housework I found that it made a big difference, keeping my mind off things I shouldn’t worry about. Most importantly I realized that it probably pleased Ms Lee to see me becoming more focused and devoted to my housework.

I have noticed over the last week or two that when I take my chastity sleeve off and shower that my penis no longer gets the slightest bit hard. I used to have to be careful to avoid getting it excited when I washed around it but recently it has ceased to respond to that. Perversely the only time it attempts an erection is when I am putting my chastity sleeve back on after a shower. I think it is a reaction to the realization that my penis is going back into chastity. Here is a photo I took this morning showing the head of my penis straining like mad after the chastity chains were attached, preventing any chance of my penis becoming erect:

swollen-penis-head

Some people might wonder if Ms Lee will allow me a release as a Christmas present. But I think the more appropriate Christmas gift would be if Ms Lee enjoyed having me remain in chastity well into the new year. My own pigmale desires for sexual pleasure are irrelevant but I dearly hope that Ms Lee derives some pleasure or amusement from my unrelenting chastity and frustration. I realize this might seem strange but my extended chastity and inability to experience an erection has further conditioned me to focus solely on Ms Lee’s pleasure and satisfaction.

 

 

 

 

Return to panty washing

November 11, 2016

Recently Ms Lee informed me that she wanted me to resume hand washing her panties for her. In the past I had spent a considerable amount of time learning how to properly hand wash her panties and even developed an extensive 12 step panty washing process. It involves a lot of time and effort but I would never dare take short cuts when I am privileged to perform a task such as this for her. I am always desperate to please Ms Lee so I am thrilled and thankful that she has chosen to allow me to return to my status as her devoted panty washer.

I have been working very hard to clean her panties perfectly in order to impress her with my devotion and my panty washing skills. I am hopeful that she will be pleased enough to allow me to continue with this special responsibility. I consider it an honor to be allowed to wash the panties that touch her beautiful body and I am aware that I could lose this privilege if I fail to perform at a level that meets her strict standards.

Here is a photo of her panties soaking in the sink after I added Woolite fabric cleaner:

washing-panties

In a future post I will include photos from every step of my 12 step panty washing process and discuss my efforts as Ms Lee’s panty washer in more detail.

 

 

Butler and Tea Service

February 10, 2016

As a follow up to my research on Service Oriented Submission Ms Lee directed me to study Butler and Tea service. Most of the information I was able to find on butler service focused on formal English butlers which was appropriate since formal tea service is also frequently associated with the English. Once again I was astonished at how much detail and specialization was involved. It is apparent that a good deal of study and training would be involved in order to become properly proficient at Butler and Tea service. Combined with studying how to provide professional quality massages and pedicures along with learning how to cook, clean, sew and perform housework at the level expected of a 1950’s style housewife I expect my studies will require a level of effort similar to that I devoted to obtaining my master’s degree. And not just for a few years, but for the rest of my life.

I was curious why Ms Lee did not suggest that I study formal maid service since I have frequently fantasized about being a sissy french maid in her service. As I studied formal butler service I found it quite embarrassing to face the concept that a successful professional such as myself with a masters degree would willingly serve as a menial butler, having to adhere to strict protocols and toil endlessly all day long. Fantasizing about being a sissy french maid provided me with a perverted sexual thrill that made it easy and in fact pleasing to think about. However, contemplating being a formal male butler removed the thrill of the fantasy for me and forced me to focus on the service I was to provide to Ms Lee. I had to think about the benefits and pleasure I would be providing to Ms Lee which is the whole point of my devotion to her. I should not be concerned about what I might be getting out of my service, in fact that would only distract me from providing the flawless service that is required from me. During the course of my research I came across a blog by a lifestyle mistress who wanted a butler submissive instead of a sissy maid for the exact same reason.

Recently the number of people who desire to have butlers has increased greatly. In the early to mid 20th century the employment of formal english type butlers had decreased dramatically but during the past few decades their numbers have increased once again as the number of millionaires and billionaires increased markedly. In larger households the butler holds the formal position of head of all the household servants but in smaller households he may be the sole servant. In either case the butler is responsible for being knowledgeable of high social etiquette and protocol regarding every facet of household care and personal service.

I was fascinated to learn that there are a number of world class butler schools in existence such as The British Butler Guild, the Butler Bureau, the British Butler Institute and the Bespoke Bureau. These schools provide training in all areas of butler service including British Etiquette & Accent, Service & Table Management, Silver Service, Housekeeping, Mixology, Professional Cooking, Pastry Chef, Laundry Care, Valet Service, Chauffeur, Flower Design and Gardening, Coffee (and of course Tea!) Service, Shoe Care, Concierge Lifestyle Management and many other special skills required to be a full service servant.

Being a professional butler clearly requires a graduate school level of training and many butlers earn a commensurate salary. They become invaluable members of the household which would collapse without their skills and knowledge. Of course as the Property of Ms Lee I will not be receiving any monetary reward in return for my services. Instead, my compensation will be a sense of satisfaction gained by providing Ms Lee with flawless service and pleasure. My desperate need to please Ms Lee insures that I will work longer and harder than any normal servant, my only rest coming during the short hours that I am allowed to sleep before rising early to begin my toils again.

An example of the level of detail and services involved in being a butler is that provided by a valet. Valet services are just a subset of what a butler is responsible for. A valet is the closest male equivalent to a lady’s maid and is responsible to tend to their master’s every personal need from the moment the master rises from bed till the end of the evening when the master goes to bed. The valet is to always be by their master’s side, ready for instant service whenever the need arises, whether that be dressing after rising from bed or assistance in bathing, particularly in the case of a ‘lady’s maid’. A valet or lady’s maid must be skillful in all aspects of personal service including hair-dressing, dressmaking, packing, arranging the toilets for dinner parties, balls, etc.”

I have to admit that when considering all the aspects of service to Ms Lee I am most attracted to and excited by the idea of being her personal valet. I understand that many of my duties such as cleaning and laundry require working by myself but I thrive on providing pleasure to Ms Lee and strongly desire the positive feedback I would receive from my personal service to her. However the first priority is always Ms Lee’s satisfaction so I will have to get used to the fact that I will spend many hours toiling alone in her service. While doing so I will have to remind myself that I am toiling for her pleasure and my reward is knowing that my service makes her life easier and more pleasant.

In addition to the duties of a valet, a butler is also responsible for everything involved in taking care of the home of their master. This obviously involves all aspects of cleaning the home but also includes maintenance issues, organization of parties and events and anything else that might involve the needs of the master or the master’s home. A butler needs to be highly organized so that he stays on top of everything involved in running the home while keeping an even closer eye on the needs of their master.

Ms Lee also instructed me to research formal tea service since that will be an important part of my service to her. I had initially thought about tea service involving me serving tea to Ms Lee alone but I quickly found that formal tea service frequently involves serving not only my master (Ms Lee) but also a number of her guests. I have to admit that I feel my face turning red as I consider what those groups might involve, from groups of her girl friends to one of her boyfriends or even her husband if one day she was to marry. I am sure her boyfriend or husband would be well aware of the depths of my submission to Ms Lee but I suspect I would be highly embarrassed, wondering whether certain girl friends of her that I was serving tea knew that I was being kept in strict chastity and always wearing panties. It would be even worse if those in the know teased me in the presence of others who were not aware.

One of the first things I learned was that the formal afternoon tea service is actually called low tea, not high tea. High tea refers to tea at dinner while afternoon tea, which is more focused just on the tea service is called low tea because it is served at low coffee tables. A traditional low tea service begins with the delivery of invitations to the guests ahead of time. I’m not sure how often Ms Lee will require formal invitations but when she does that will involve yet another skill that I will have to master since the invitations must be professionally prepared (sometimes handwritten in calligraphy) and delivered with the proper formality. There are also formalities to be observed at the beginning of the tea service, for instance the introduction of a guest of honor.

A proper low tea service also involves a considerable amount of preparation regarding the accessories and the tea itself. Accessories include the teapot, cream and sugar bowls, a pitcher for hot water, a plate for lemon slices, plates for food/snacks, flatware, napkins and anything else required by the guests. The tea to be served is an involved topic all by itself, beyond the scope of this paper. Then there are the formalities and procedures for the preparation and serving of the tea. I was flabbergasted to learn just how involved and painstaking a formal tea service is. For instance, here is the formal way to stir a cup of tea:

STIRRING A CUP OF TEA

Stirring a cup of tea is done gently and noiselessly by moving the teaspoon in a small arch back and forth in the center of the cup.

  • Do not allow the teaspoon to touch the sides or rim of the cup.
  • Remove the spoon and place it on the saucer behind the cup, with the handle of the spoon pointing in the same direction as the handle of the cup.
  • Visualize the face of a clock on the saucer and properly place the handle of the cup and the handle of the spoon at four on the clock.

Every step of formal tea service is just as exacting and requires extensive study and practice in order to carry it out properly. I will obviously be spending a considerable amount of time preparing for my first formal tea party for Ms Lee’s pleasure as I dare not embarrass her with substandard service. I may be posting a future entry focused just on formal tea service in order to give it the proper attention it deserves.

After studying formal butler and tea service for Ms Lee I have developed a deeper appreciation for what it means to be in the service of a wonderful person like Ms Lee. I sincerely want nothing more than to please her in every way and make her proud of the level of dedication my service to her involves. However I am concerned about the extensive effort I will have to commit to in order to become a suitable servant for her. The last thing I want is to become some embarrassing caricature of a sissy maid for her. I believe she assigned me to study butler and tea service so I would understand that she does not desire a male’s fantasy sissy maid. She desires, expects and deserves a true formal servant, a butler, valet, a man servant of whom she can be proud. My goal in life is to please Ms Lee and part of my mission will now clearly involve extensive study and practice in order to become a servant she can be proud of.

I am reminded again that I must focus on Ms Lee’s pleasure and not mine. I must become the servant she desires and not the one I fantasize about. This exercise of studying Butler and Tea service has helped me think this through and realize that neither Ms Lee nor I would be satisfied with my service if it only pandered to my fantasies. She and I will only realize the true fulfillment of my destiny as her devoted servant if I learn how to become a true life servant and stop playing with fantasy.

I have already begun to apply my learnings to my daily life. I am mindful of my ultimate destiny as Ms Lee’s servant as I go about my daily life, particularly when doing anything that involves housework or cooking. I have been more careful to study proper techniques, and more dedicated to doing quality work. I also have to admit that it has been very motivating to think about my present efforts contributing to my being better prepared for one day pleasing Ms Lee with my professional level service.

Plugged again

July 27, 2015

I have become very focused on Ms Lee and her pleasure but she apparently thought that my focus on her could be improved. She recently told me that I was to wear my butt plug for at least 5 consecutive hours a day until my next session of touching myself. Although I have been using my butt plug during my daily morning Worship sessions it has been quite a while since I have endured it for anything near 5 hours a day so there was no doubt that Ms Lee’s latest expectation for me would be quite effective at improving my focus upon her.

My first day of being plugged for 5 hours was quite an ordeal. Within an hour or two of being plugged I was already feeling nearly unbearable discomfort as the plug tortured my rear. I knew I was walking funny and it was beginning to get difficult to sit down properly. By the third hour or so my poor rear was starting to sting from the rubbing of the plug and I was getting desperate to remove it. But no matter how bad I was hurting I was determined to be obedient and do as Ms Lee expected. I am always desperate to please her and I did not want to disappoint her on my first day of being plugged. When I finally reached the 5 hour point I promptly removed my plug, relieved to have the invader removed. I went to bed nearly exhausted from my ordeal and did not want to even think about wearing the plug the next day.

But the very next day I obediently did as Ms Lee expected and inserted my plug for another 5 hour ordeal of discomfort and distress. To make matters even worse I needed to mow my lawn that day. I have a large lawn and use a riding tractor which naturally vibrates quite a bit. As I bounced around on the tractor my plug kept getting rammed further up my rear and the vibrations of the tractor were driving me crazy. It felt like I was bouncing on top of a vibrating anal dildo. Normally riding the tractor makes me feel manly, but not when I’m chastised, plugged and pantied!

By the third day I was beginning to get used to wearing the plug but as the discomfort from the pain subsided I was presented with a new torment. It was getting to the point where the plug was teasing my poor penis relentlessly as it pressed against my prostate. As my penis strained against my chastity sleeve I felt a desperate pigmale desire to take Ms Lee’s property in my hands. My frustration was made all the worse as I felt my sissy ruffled panties embracing my chastised penis. Here is a photo of my plugged rear embraced by my white sissy ruffled panties:

Plugged, chastised & pantied

As I got more frustrated and fought the urge to touch myself I began to squirm in my seat, causing my plug to press even harder against my prostate which in turn got me even more excited and frustrated. My plug was driving me crazy but I kept thinking about Ms Lee, hoping she would be pleased with my obedience. I also suspected she might be amused at my discomfort but I was glad to endure it if that pleased her.

I still have a few days to go before I will be allowed to beg to touch myself again. Even if my begging satisfies Ms Lee and it suits her whim to allow me to touch myself it frequently pleases her to delay the approval for a few days. This means I probably still have quite a few days of being plugged to look forward to. The good news is that this will provide me with many more opportunities to sharpen my focus on Ms Lee as I endure more discomfort and teasing for her pleasure.

Feeling like a sissy

July 16, 2015

I’m not sure exactly when the change occurred but I’ve realized that my reaction to wearing panties has gradually changed from embarrassment to anticipation and excitement. I’ve always gotten hard and excited in response to the embarrassment I experience when wearing panties but now my excitement is also due to the pure pleasure I obtain from wearing them.

Recently I have had some discussions with Ms Lee because I have been struggling with admitting to myself that I am a sissy. I have been wearing panties and experiencing chastity for years but I had always felt like a man that was just experimenting with submission. Being told to wear panties was part of that submission and although wearing them got me excited and hard it was always due to the embarrassment I endured. But over time the primary reason for my excitement has shifted from embarrassment to the enjoyment I now experience from wearing panties.

I have become quite obsessed with my pretty panties and I have accumulated a large collection including a number of them with garters and frilly skirts. Plain panties are no longer good enough, I now search for frilly and sexy panties, preferably with a lacy garter belt. I think a primary driver of this obsession was due to the sexual starvation I endured when in chastity. I desperately craved any sort of sexual stimulation and I learned to enjoy the feel of my silky panties embracing my chastised genitals. Attached is a photo of one of my favorite pairs of panties, they include a lacy built in skirt and detachable garters.
Red skirted panties

Another obsession I had developed due to Ms Lee’s training involves my extensive collection of anal toys. Ms Lee requires that I conduct a morning Worship session every day that includes having my hungry rear stuffed with my anal plug. I have learned to enjoy the sexual stimulation I experience when my plug presses against my prostate. Just like what happened with wearing panties, I have come to crave my morning Worship sessions and the frustrating excitement I derive from having my anal plug tease my prostate. And just like with my panties, my obsession with my anal plugs makes me feel like a sissy. More information on my morning Worship sessions can be found in this blog entry – How i Worship my Goddess

Ms Lee told me that I should not be ashamed of anything that makes me feel good and she encouraged me to embrace being a sissy if that made me happy. While admitting that I was a sissy felt right to me I was still uneasy because of my preconception that all sissies are gay and that many of them wear diapers and act like little children or babies. While these things may be fine for other sissies they are not part of what I am. Ms Lee helped me to understand that I should not worry about the preconceptions of what is ‘normal’ for a sissy and that I should just enjoy those aspects that make me happy.

I am now putting Ms Lee’s advice into practice as I embrace being a sissy. I truly enjoy wearing panties and playing with my anal dildo and I am no longer distracted with the preconceptions about being a sissy that don’t apply to me. Once again Ms Lee has helped me to better understand my submissive nature. I am truly blessed to be owned by Ms Lee and I am very grateful.

Shaved again

July 7, 2015

I mentioned in my previous blog entry that Ms Lee’s expects me to always keep the area around my panties smooth and free of any unsightly fur. I have been working very hard to maintain a hair free appearance in this area but now Ms Lee has expanded the area where she expects this grooming to occur. In response to a recent photo of my panties that I sent to her she told me that there was some fur on my left leg that distracted from my prettiness. She then told me to correct this situation, asking me if I didn’t want to be her pretty girly boy.

I saw that there was indeed some fur on my left leg an inch or two below the edge of my panties. I was deeply disappointed with myself for offending Ms Lee with my unsightly fur again so I promptly shaved a large area on the front top portion of both legs so that no hair was visible anywhere near my panties. I sent a new photo to Ms Lee apologizing for my failure. I also assured her that I did indeed want to be her pretty girly boy even though it deeply embarrassed me to say so. I am beginning to feel like quite a sissy, wearing nothing but panties and not allowed to even touch myself without her permission. My embarrassment about being a sissy had recently been reinforced by a comment I had received concerning how I look wearing my panties:
requesting-feedback-regarding-my-panties

I was shocked when I received a response from Ms Lee informing me that I had addressed the wrong area. She had been referring to the fur that was visible on the outside of my left leg, not on the front. I had aggressively shaved the entirely wrong area for nothing! I could only hope that it amused Ms Lee that I had done so. I then shaved the outsides of both legs and sent her the attached new photo of my well shaved legs.
Shaved again

I was greatly relieved when Ms Lee informed me that she was pleased with the results of my shaving, saying that I looked much nicer. I do try very hard to look pretty for Ms Lee but I still struggle with the embarrassment I feel about being a sissy.

It just occurred to me that I forgot to mention that I had sent the initial photo I mentioned to Ms Lee as I was begging her for permission to touch myself (it had been a week since I had last touched myself). Although she did give me permission once I was properly groomed I realize that I had been much more concerned about offending her with my unsightly fur and making sure that she was pleased with my attempt to correct the situation. Obtaining permission to touch myself was an insignificant matter in comparison, as it should be.

The return of the sleeve

June 28, 2015

I recently made a big mistake by comparing myself to other men. I had been telling Ms Lee about the unbearable frustration I have been enduring and I said that I didn’t know how much longer I could go without tasting the sexual pleasure that most men get to enjoy at their leisure. At the time I was begging Ms Lee for my weekly permission to touch myself and I realize now that I should not have compared myself to other men in regards to their sexual freedom.

When Ms Lee responded to my begging She told me that she could see that I was really beginning to suffer but she had also noticed that I had made the mistake of comparing myself to other men. She reminded me that I was her property and that meant that I didn’t compare to other men. She then informed me that the consequence was that I was to put on my chastity sleeve and not remove it until she had given me permission. She also informed me that I had squandered my weekly opportunity to touch myself and I was to wait till the next week to beg again.

I had thought that I couldn’t possibly get any more frustrated but once more Ms Lee turned my world upside down and drove me deeper into submission to her. Although not being allowed to touch myself was extremely frustrating I at least got to enjoy the feel of an unrestrained erection like a real man. But I am not a real man, I am Ms Lee’s property and now I no longer get to even enjoy erections, much less touch myself.

I had also forgotten just how difficult it was to put my chastity sleeve on. (Those who are not familiar with my chastity sleeve can check some of the past postings about it: Chastity sleeve postings).

It is a major struggle to get my sleeve on, especially since my deprived penis gets quite excited from the handling required to get it in the sleeve. Once in place my sleeve performs an extremely effective job of preventing anything approaching a full erection. And when my naughty penis does try to become erect it is severely punished by the chains holding the sleeve in place. Those chains cut in deeply whenever my penis makes a futile effort at becoming erect.

The photo below shows my penis restrained by my chastity sleeve. This is a homemade sleeve which has the advantage of being unnoticeable under my pants. The tightness of the restricting chains is also easily adjustable, a feature which Ms Lee has used to her advantage. She has at times enjoyed having me remove links to make my sleeve even tighter but she has never allowed me to add any links back once they have been removed. Anyone who is interested in how my sleeve is fashioned can check out this posting – Ms Lee’s Chastity Sleeve

You might notice in the photo below that none of my fur pokes out from beneath my panties. I have previously made the mistake of presenting myself to Ms Lee with some random hairs showing and every time She has me correct my error, removing even more. Ms Lee does not like to see any fur showing from beneath my panties so I am always carefully grooming myself. Some of my panties are fairly skimpy and at this point I have removed quite a bit.

Pantied and Chastised

Requesting feedback regarding my panties

June 20, 2015

Anyone who browses through this blog will learn that Ms Lee enjoys having me wear panties instead of male underwear. As she expects, I now wear nothing but panties, 24×7. Male underwear is strictly prohibited. During my years as her property I have built up an extensive collection of silky & lacy panties, probably more than most women.

Keeping me in panties provides Ms Lee with a number of benefits. For starters, it still embarrasses me to no end, which greatly amuses Ms Lee. I have learned the hard way that it pleases her immensely to see me embarrassed in a number of ways and panty wearing is one of her favorites. Wearing panties also puts me in an intensely submissive state of mind, making me putty in her hands. Being kept in panties also provides her with the opportunity to embarrass me further as she requires that absolutely no pubic hair be visible. This is particularly challenging as some of my panties are quite skimpy. I spend a considerable amount of time & effort shaving the area around my panties as I desperately want to please Ms Lee and I fear the punishments she will administer if I fail to keep myself properly presentable.

Probably one of the most significant benefits Ms Lee enjoys by having me in panties is the merciless teasing that my deprived penis suffers as a result. After weeks of abiding by Ms Lee’s no touching rule I am desperate for any sort of sexual stimulation and the sensation of my penis straining under my silky panties drives me mad. The inhuman frustration I endure as a result of this teasing drives me even further into submission but I suspect Ms Lee just plain enjoys knowing that I am hopelessly frustrated and desperate.

Those who are interested in reading more about my panty wearing are encouraged to check out the dozens of postings under the Panty and Panty Washing categories. But at this time I would like to request, no – make that beg, for feedback regarding how I look wearing the panties in the photo below (these are the panties I am wearing today). Please provide any feedback at all, positive, negative or indifferent. I would also be interested in any suggestions on how I could better please Ms Lee with my panty wearing.
My purple panties

Ms Lee Takes Her Property Back

June 1, 2015

After a very long absence I am bringing this blog back to life. My status with Ms Lee has undergone a number of changes over the last couple of years but recently she has taken me back as her strictly controlled property, with a number of new expectations. One of those expectations was that I resume weekly updates to this blog, without fail. I am quite aware of the severe consequences I would suffer if I failed to meet one of Ms Lee’s expectations so you can expect that my updates will be regular and timely.

This morning I got on my knees to thank Ms Lee for taking me back as her strictly controlled property. It will be difficult to adhere faithfully to all of her expectations but I am firmly committed to doing so, no matter how hard or frustrating it may be. Her no touching rule is especially maddening. My penis is straining against my lacy white panties as I type this, squirming in my seat in desperation. I don’t think words can properly describe just how stressed I am right now as I fight the battle to resist the urge to take her property in my hands. At present she has not required me to wear my chastity sleeve which in a perverse way makes things even more frustrating. My sleeve had always prevented me from enjoying anything near a full erection but now I must endure the incredible frustration of experiencing a rock hard erection that I am prohibited from touching.

It is particularly difficult in the morning when I wake up with a morning erection and feel the natural, naughty urge to masturbate like a little school boy. But as I awaken further I feel the overpowering frustration that comes with remembering that I am not allowed to touch Ms Lee’s property without her permission. I then must struggle against temptation as my deprived penis strains like mad inside my frilly panties. My panties add a nasty twist to my frustration as their silky caress of my penis teases it mercilessly. One of Ms Lee’s new expectations is that I no longer wear any male underwear at all. Nothing but frilly and lacy panties are allowed.

Before Ms Lee had recently taken me back as Her firmly controlled property I had fallen back into the naughty habit of frequently masturbating at will, sometimes multiple times a day. Ms Lee put an immediate end to my naughty pleasures and it has now been a full week since I last masturbated. It has been a major shock to go this long without cumming but I am grateful to Ms Lee. I understand that my lack of willpower regarding masturbation and playing with myself means that I need the firm control that Ms Lee has graciously provided me with.

Ms Lee has also generously given me permission to touch myself and masturbate on Wednesday morning, between 6 and 6:30 AM. She expects me to ruin my release by squeezing the tip of my penis to prevent the pleasurable explosion of cumming which will probably result in a frustrating dribble of cum, preventing me from enjoying the wild, free release a real man would experience. However I feel extremely grateful as I did not expect her to allow a release so soon at all. I will then not be allowed to touch myself again until I properly beg her again for permission. I am planning on waiting at least a week before doing so as I want to be in the proper state of mind to beg her with sincerity.

I actually could probably beg quite sincerely the very next day but I am hopeful that it will please Ms Lee if I endure an entire week of intense frustration before I bother her with the insignificant issue of my sexual pleasure. My focus is solely on her pleasure and my sexual pleasure is completely dependent on her whim and mood. In fact I am desperately hopeful that she will be pleased with my frustration as I doubt I would be allowed any sexual pleasure at all if my intense desperation did not please or amuse her.

Ms Lee’s panty washing boy

February 18, 2013

Recently I have assumed responsibility for washing Ms Lee’s panties. I am embarrassed to admit that I actually had to beg her to allow me this honor. I am not sure if she doubted my ability to properly clean her panties or if she suspected I might just be anxious to handle and sniff the panties that had embraced her gorgeous derriere (perhaps both). I have to admit that my penis strains like crazy against my chastity sleeve whenever I am washing Ms Lee’s panties. I also get quite excited by the wondrous aroma that exudes from her worn panties but I would never dare molest them in any way (Ms Lee had previously warned me that I would be punished if I ever did so).

I finally convinced Ms Lee to give me a chance to demonstrate I could clean her panties to her satisfaction but first I had to diligently study how to properly clean a woman’s delicates. I was actually red in the face as I browsed the online site of Better Homes and Gardens for panty washing instructions. I had often noticed that magazine on the kitchen table as I grew up and I never suspected that one day I would be studying it like a good, obedient housekeeper.

By the time I had convinced Ms Lee to allow me to wash some of her panties I had studied over half a dozen sites on panty washing and had practiced on my own. I was glad I had done so because I learned quite a few things that I had been neglecting in the care of my own panties. Although I had always hand washed them I had been fairly careless about it. I have now established a twelve step procedure for washing Ms Lee’s panties as follows:

1) Fill sink with cool water. Warm or hot water would clean quicker and be easier on my hands, but could shrink the panties.

2) Add one capful of Woolite fabric cleaner, stir water well to mix

3) Dip panties into water and let soak for 5 to 10 minutes

4) Rub panties gently to loosen dirt and stains, let soak for another 5 to 10 minutes

5) Rub panties lightly, but thoroughly to clean completely. Examine carefully to make sure any stains are removed

6) Drain sink and rinse panties under running, cold water

7) Fill sink with cold water again and swirl panties under the water to clean more soap out of them

8) Drain sink and rinse panties under cold water one more time to make sure all soap is gone

9) Squeeze panties gently to remove excess water, do NOT wring. That could misshape the panties

10) Lay panties on a clean, dry white towel, roll up gently within towel to remove more water

11) Lay panties flat on another clean, dry white towel for drying

12) Turn panties over occasionally for next day or two until dry

The process I have developed involves quite a bit of time and work but so far Ms Lee seems pleased by my efforts. I hope that she enjoys having one less thing to worry about, knowing that she will always have perfectly clean panties available. I am so glad that I have been able to perform this menial task for her and I am thankful she allowed me the opportunity to demonstrate that I could clean her panties in an acceptable manner. I am always desperate to find new ways to please Ms Lee and I am hopeful that she will allow me to continue to be her faithful panty washing boy.

Of course I must also admit that it gives me a thrill to know that throughout every day Ms Lee is wearing a pair of panties that I have worked so diligently to wash. I hope that once in a while she smiles, enjoying the fruit of my labors. But somehow I suspect that more often she just takes her freshly laundered panties for granted, not even having to bother thinking about all the toil and dedication that went into keeping them immaculately clean.