A new goal

During my last session of begging Ms Lee for permission to milk myself I mentioned that I felt tortured by the desperate desire to touch myself and I said that I thought I would be happier if she could completely eradicate the pigmale inside of me. She kindly agreed to help me and told me to learn how to milk myself through my prostate with out touching my penis or scrotum. She wants me to keep her appraised of my progress and let her know when I have reached the point where I can milk myself at will.

The very next day I began practicing to learn how to milk myself, using my ‘bigger tool’:
Learning to milk myself

Fortunately there are many websites with information on learning how to milk yourself such as these:
prostate milking
forbidden art of prostate milking
pleasure mechanics

I must admit that I have mixed feelings about this new goal that Ms Lee has set for me. On the one hand I am looking forward to having the pigmale inside of me eradicated or at least harnessed for Ms Lee’s purposes. I believe it will please her greatly when I have learned how to milk myself and I am always anxious to find ways to please Ms Lee. But I am also concerned about the changes in my ‘sex life’ that achievement of this goal will bring about.

Ms Lee has not stated exactly how learning to milk myself will result in the eradication of the pigmale in me but I suspect that my opportunities for touching myself will be strictly limited in the future, if not fully eradicated along with the pigmale in me. It is the pigmale in me that creates the maddeningly frustrating desire to touch myself so if the pigmale is eradicated will the desire to touch myself also be eliminated? I suspect that Ms Lee will allow me to milk myself frequently but I don’t know if that will completely eliminate the desire to touch myself. Even if the desire for a release is satiated by my milking I may still desire to touch myself for the sheer pleasure that stroking an erect penis brings.

Of course stroking an erect penis is the act of a real man and Ms Lee has made it clear that I am not a real man. I am her property and permission to touch her property is only granted at her whim, if it pleases her. It is quite possible that once I learn to milk myself Ms Lee may no longer see any need to allow me to touch her property. I can’t begin to imagine what it would be like to no longer touch myself at all, nor what it would be like to only experience a release by milking myself with no touching allowed. But if Ms Lee expects this to become my new ‘sex life’ then I will be anxious to please her regardless of how significant the changes to my sex life might be.

I am not entirely sure how this will all turn out and I don’t know if Ms Lee will come right out and tell me exactly what she expects. She frequently likes to let me sort things out for myself, probably because I learn better that way.

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